Have I changed?
    - Thursday, March 30, 2006

I've been living my life like a dream for the past few weeks. I am not even sure if I should say it's like a dream..cos it seems as though I am feeling nothing at all.. Pretty indifferent I must say. I've been doing things I never did before, like exercising regularly, going church and spending some time with God,and also trying to get to study after so long of leaving my textbooks untouched. I am not spending time on entertainment, going out shopping etc etc...but yet I have so little time for myself. I am not sure why too..

I am so irritated with the hassles of getting to school and back, waiting for the bus, having to think of what and where to eat, having to cope with bad stomach cramps, not to mention the horrible weather these few days and so many other little things. I gotta admit I am not the most patient person in the world...but at least I am trying my best to be a nicer person...at least from my perspective. I try not to argue with my siblings, not to get mad at my group mates for doing sloppy work etc but controlling your anger is really difficult man...

That's why praying to God does help indeed..I keep asking God to help me be a better person...little by little I know he is helping me...at times I fall, but I soon get up when I say a little prayer to Him...I am slowly getting better as well...no more bad feelings, no more frustrations, no more pining....just a little more hope that each day will be a better day? Or have I just completely given up hope in this aspect already?

raeanchiq penned her thoughts @ 11:23 PM